In a development that will surprise absolutely no one who has ever squinted at a label and thought, "Eh, probably fine," the U.S. Department of Agriculture has announced a recall of more than 167,000 pounds of raw pork, beef, and goat products. The reason? They were produced without federal inspection. Which is the culinary equivalent of driving without a license - except the car is made of meat and the passengers are your digestive system.

The recall comes from Star Meat Delivery Inc., a company based in Lucama, N.C., which is pulling the products after officials discovered they were labeled with a false USDA mark of inspection. Because nothing says "trust us" like a fake government stamp.

"Food produced without inspection may contain undeclared allergens, harmful bacteria, or other contaminants that put consumer health and safety at risk," warned the USDA's Food Safety and Inspection Service (FSIS), in a statement that doubles as a list of things you really don't want in your brisket. The FSIS added that it's "concerned that some product may be in the refrigerators or freezers of consumers, restaurants, or retailers." So if you've got mystery meat in your freezer with a suspiciously official-looking label, congratulations - you might be part of a nationwide recall.

Consumers who bought the recalled products are urged not to eat them. Instead, throw them away or return them to the place of purchase. (And maybe reconsider your relationship with that particular butcher.)

The USDA warns that any products bearing the false establishment number "EST. 1363" are not safe to consume. Other identifying details include a production date before Sept. 22, 2026, and a label reading "A&D Foods." So if you see those markers, step away from the goat.

The problem was uncovered during "surveillance activities," according to the FSIS - which sounds less like food safety and more like a spy thriller, but okay. The agency notes that as more information becomes available, more items could be added to the product list. Because why not make a massive recall even more massive?

Currently, consumers can visit the FSIS website for a complete list of recalled products and to view available labels of the impacted items. As of Tuesday, there had been no confirmed reports of illness. Anyone concerned about an illness is encouraged to contact a healthcare provider. So far, the only thing confirmed is that 167,000 pounds of uninspected meat is a lot of meat - and a lot of trust to lose.