In the latest episode of Tech's Most Petty Legal Drama, OpenAI has filed a motion to dismiss Apple's trade secrets lawsuit, and it's basically the corporate equivalent of saying, "You can't steal something that was left in the open."

The AI company's legal strategy doesn't dwell on whether former Apple employees actually accessed confidential info. Instead, it argues that Apple's own security practices - like letting employees use personal iCloud accounts for work and failing to revoke access after they left - undermine the claim that the information qualifies as legally protected trade secrets.

Apple's complaint, filed in July, accuses OpenAI of orchestrating a scheme to nab confidential hardware info from former Apple engineers. This week, Apple asked the court to expedite discovery, claiming its internal investigation suggests additional former employees may have participated in or witnessed the alleged theft.

OpenAI fired back with exhibits, including text messages showing that an Apple manager remained logged into the personal iCloud account of defendant and former Apple engineer Chang Liu after he left the company to transfer files - and later, that same manager asked Liu for help with technical questions about Apple projects. So much for "offboarding."

OpenAI also accuses Apple of omitting the consequences of its own "inexplicable information-management practices" from the original complaint, noting that Apple failed to properly secure systems when employees departed, creating confusion and unwanted access that Apple now conveniently calls theft.

While this sounds a bit like "the door was unlocked, so it wasn't really stealing," OpenAI argues it shows former employees were just trying to help their old colleagues. It also pushes the narrative that if the info wasn't secured as trade secrets, maybe it wasn't really trade secrets.

OpenAI also points out that Apple hasn't specified which "trade secrets" or confidential components were allegedly stolen, instead referring to them as "generic categories of the product-development process - such as component manufacturing, product testing, vendor and supplier relationships, and distribution channels."

And here's the kicker: OpenAI claims the lawsuit is just Apple's way of slowing down a competitor in AI-powered hardware innovation. "OpenAI has no use, need or desire for Apple's trade secrets," the motion reads. "OpenAI is building something entirely new and different from anything at Apple. OpenAI does have an interest in hiring the best engineers, inventors, developers and creators - many of whom have decided to leave Apple and to come to OpenAI, attracted by the innovative and exciting work the company is doing. Apple might not like that."

In a final zinger, OpenAI says: "Apple should not be permitted to use a baseless and pretextual lawsuit to make up for its shortcomings in the market for talent and retaining its employees, and its failures to integrate AI into its products."

So, in summary: Apple says OpenAI stole secrets; OpenAI says Apple's security was so lax it's lucky the secrets weren't stolen by a rogue raccoon. The court will now decide if "we didn't lock the vault" is a valid legal defense.