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Articles
Nov 7
Researchers Find Murder Isn't Just Aggression With the Volume Knob Broken Off; America Says 'Hold My AR-15'
Nov 7
Young People Discover That Grieving Together Is Slightly Less Awful Than Grieving Alone
Nov 7
São Paulo Grand Prix Secures Future Until 2035, Because Apparently Rain and Grid Penalties Are a Selling Point
Nov 7
National Trust Votes to Bank Somewhere It Doesn't Have to Explain to Members, Barclays Unfazed
Nov 7
Stephen Miller Promoted to Chief of Staff, Immediately Pledges 'Absolute Loyalty' to the One Man He Was Already Pledging It To
Nov 7
Great Lakes Activists Brace for Underwater Datacenters While Everyone Else Asks 'Wait, What?'
Nov 7
Industry's 'High Safety' Plastic Chemical Linked to Smaller Babies, Because of Course It Is
Nov 7
Russia Preps for Peace Talks by Bombarding Ukraine's Power Grid, Because Diplomacy Is Apparently a Contact Sport
Nov 7
Rubin Observatory Finds Two Faint Galaxies, Promises Hundreds More Like It's Collecting Stamps
Nov 7
Study Finds Europe's Ancient Forests Were Basically Sunny Meadows With Snacks, Not Dark Tree Tunnels
Nov 7
Nationwide Launches 'Market-Leading' 5.3% Savings Account, Immediately Reminds You It's for Members Only
Nov 7
England Rugby Backed Into a Corner, Which Is Apparently Their Happy Place
Nov 7
Government Vows to End Rough Sleeping by Christmas, Just in Time for Its Own Early-Release Policy to Make It Worse
Nov 7
New Zealand Election 2026: Nation Waits to Learn Which Chris Will Be PM, and Whether Anyone Actually Voted for Them
Nov 7
Ten Years After Paris, Climate Talks Ask: 'What's the Point?' (Answer: Still Arguably Yes, But Bring Snacks)
Nov 7
Alpine Linux Fixes OpenSSH Flaw That Let One Character Ruin Your Whole Weekend
Nov 7
Ex-Kennedy Adviser Says White House Wanted Sugar Money More Than Health Policy
Nov 7
Paraguay President Impeached, Arrested, and Confined to House in Record Time - Ueno Bank Not So Fortunate
Nov 7
Satellite Company Decides Building Rockets Is Easier Than Booking a Ride, Timeline Suggests Otherwise
Nov 7
Mortgage Rates Dip for Third Week, Stocks Stage a Modest Comeback, and Everyone Still Feels Poor
Nov 7
Spelling Bee Crowns Champion After 200,000 Students Eliminated, Proving Vowels Are a Cruel Mistress
Nov 7
OpenAI Raises $11 Billion at $1.25 Trillion Valuation, Which Is Apparently a Disappointment Now
Nov 7
Geologists Blame Mantle for Billion-Year Gap in Rock Record, Because of Course It's Never the Mantle's Fault
Nov 6
Sen. Chris Murphy to Miss 'Several Weeks' of Votes After Small Stroke, Because Even Rising Stars Need Rehab
Nov 6
Shure Drops MV7 Plus Price, Proving Podcasters Can Finally Afford to Sound Like They Know What They're Doing
Nov 6
Wales Moves to Ban Under-16s From Buying Energy Drinks, Because Apparently 'Red Bull Gives You Wings' Wasn't Meant Literally for Kids
Nov 6
Thomas Markle Arrested in Florida on Child Sexual Abuse Material Charges, Because 2024 Had Room for One More Plot Twist
Nov 6
Foodbank Closes After 16 Years of Feeding People, Because Apparently That's Where We Are Now
Nov 6
Blue Origin Delays New Glenn (Again), China Promises Moon by 2030, and Artemis II Literally Ripped the Sky a New One
Nov 6
Football News Live: Manager Clarifies Forest Is Not a Spa, Ronaldo Retires, and Everyone Is Very Focused on the Next Game
Nov 6
Startup Unveils 32MB Speech Model, Proving Not Everything Needs a Data Center
Nov 6
Europeans Overwhelmingly Believe in Climate Change, Overwhelmingly Prefer Fixing It Without Inconveniencing Themselves
Nov 6
Met Chief Warns Policing 'Heading for Failure' Unless It Fixes a System Last Updated When the Beatles Were Still Together
Nov 6
Tesla Quietly Retires the Cybertruck to Make Room for Even More Robotaxis
Nov 6
Tech Stocks Tumble After Midterms, and Your Pension Is Quietly Along for the Ride
Nov 6
Scotland Celebrates Bonfire Night by Setting Police Cars on Fire, Because Tradition
Nov 6
Panipat's Recycling Boom: Where Fast Fashion's Discards Cost Workers Their Limbs, and Factory Owners Face No Consequences
Nov 6
NASA Astronaut Photographs Utah River That Can't Stop Looping Back on Itself
Nov 6
Twisted Teens Drop Third Album of 2026, Because Apparently Two Wasn't Enough
Nov 6
Science Confirms Your 9pm Biscuit Raid Is Biology, Not Weakness
Nov 6
Delhi Unveils Winter Action Plan, Air Quality Immediately Reminds Everyone It's Still Delhi
Nov 6
Liberal Campaign Bus Reverses Into Awning, Proving 'Fresh Start' Includes New Ways to Hit Things
Nov 6
Space Company Raises $730 Million to Build 737-Satellite AI Constellation, Because Subtlety Is Dead
Nov 6
Rolls-Royce Grows Metal Blades That Defy Physics, Because Apparently Casting Is for Peasants
Nov 6
Turkey Manhunt Ends After Eight Killed in Multi-Location Shooting Spree, Because Apparently One Location Wasn't Enough
Nov 6
Government to Employers: Just Put the Salary in the Ad Already
Nov 6
Serve Robotics Wants to Be the AWS of Robots, Because Every Tech Company Eventually Wants to Be AWS
Nov 5
Sunderland's Europa League Nightmare Continues, Because Of Course It Does
Nov 5
Sanders to Democrats: Now That You've Won, Maybe Try Passing the Popular Thing
Nov 5
Democrats Win Trifectas in Arizona, Pennsylvania, Wisconsin; Clean Energy Suddenly Has a Pulse
Nov 5
Civil Rights Division Chief Who Reoriented Mission Away From Civil Rights Steps Down, Shocking No One
Nov 5
Startup Proposes Catapulting Rockets to the Moon, Because Regular Rockets Apparently Weren't Expensive Enough
Nov 5
Camp Snap Shrinks Its Screen-Free Camcorder for Kids, Because Apparently Children Need 2.7K Video Now
Nov 5
Stonehenge's Altar Stone Origin Remains a Mystery, Geologists Awkwardly Pack Up Their Hammers
Nov 5
Yemen's Government Shuffles Cabinet and Generals, Because That Always Works
Nov 5
Humanoid Robot Company Agility Goes Public While Its Rival's Bankruptcy Prediction Quietly Expires
Nov 5
Cristiano Ronaldo Retires From Portugal Duty, Proving Even World Records Eventually Need a Rest
Nov 5
Economy So Bad That People Are Rediscovering Libraries, Which Are Still Free, Somehow
Nov 5
Met Police Settle With Activist Who Was 'Treated Like a Criminal' for Not Handing Over His Phone PIN
Nov 5
Uefa's Big Test: Can It Stop a Football Club From Promoting Russia's Land Grab?
Nov 5
World's Wettest Storms Are Getting Wetter, Faster, and Ruder About It
Nov 5
Midwives to NHS: Closing Maternity Units Is Not the Answer, Says Union That Has Clearly Thought This Through
Nov 5
Linux Mint 27 Switches to Yearly Releases, Boys' Names, and a Hibernation Feature That Should Have Existed Sooner
Nov 5
Police Officer Explains How He Could 'Easily' Get a Gun, Which Is Somehow Not the Most Alarming Testimony of the Day
Nov 5
Democrats Take Congress, Data Centers Take Cover: Voters Say 'Not In My Backyard' To AI's Power-Hungry Monoliths
Nov 5
Australian No. 83 Stuns Djokovic After Nearly Not Playing, Because Of Course He Did
Nov 5
Bank of England Expected to Raise Rates for First Time Since 2023, Because Inflation Never Really Left
Nov 5
Report Proposes Actually Helping Disabled Young People Find Work, Shocking No One
Nov 5
New DHS Secretary Clarifies That Deportations, Like Taxes and Bad Sequels, Will Continue
Nov 5
Nebraska's Growth Ambitions Collide With a Power Grid That's Fresh Out of Juice
Nov 5
Scientists Accidentally Invent 'Super HGF,' Because Aging Muscles Deserve a Sequel
Nov 4
DreamHost Confirms Hackers Had a Four-Month Field Day With Customer Files and Inboxes
Nov 4
Grizzly Bears Confirm They Are Still Apex Predators, Canadian Authorities Confirm
Nov 4
Sam Altman Renames Himself 'Ram Altman,' Insists He Wants You to Have All the Memory You Can Cram In There
Nov 4
Bob Dylan Meets Pope Leo XIV in a Hoodie, Because of Course He Did
Nov 4
Scientists Try Shining Light Up Football Players' Noses to Save Their Brains
Nov 4
Poundland Owner Summoned to Explain Why Saving 12,000 Jobs Is Apparently Rocket Science
Nov 4
South Africa Votes, ANC Learns What 'Service Delivery' Actually Means
Nov 4
After 15 Years, U.S. Deports 160 Haitians, Proving 'Temporary' Status Was Apparently Just a Very Long Lease
Nov 4
Rich Countries' Climate Aid to Poor Nations Stalls, Because Apparently Defence Is the Only Emergency Now
Nov 4
India's Microdrama Market Gets $80M Bet From NBCUniversal Because Apparently We All Need 95-Minute Phone Soaps
Nov 4
King Charles Calls Slave Trade 'Shameful Chapter,' Stops Just Short of the Apology Everyone Asked For
Nov 4
Anthropic's IPO Math: Revenue Up, Compute Costs Up More, Investors Shrug
Nov 4
Liverpool Owner Eyes F1 Team While Its Current Owner Eyes Fraud Charges
Nov 4
NASA Astronaut Photographs Midwest from Space, Confirms Cities Are Indeed Bright
Nov 4
Woman Spends 50 Years Fearing Her Own Spine, Discovers It Was Mostly Just Along for the Ride
Nov 4
Savills Predicts Housing Market Recovery in 2028, Because Apparently We All Needed a Five-Year Plan
Nov 4
Trump Discovers He Wasn't on the Ballot, Voters Disagree With His Agenda Anyway
Nov 4
Kellogg's Rice Krispies Now Contain No Rice, Because Weather Has Opinions
Nov 4
Canva 'Refounds' Itself by Cutting 22% of Staff, Because Nothing Says Fresh Start Like 1,271 Layoffs
Nov 4
King Charles Expresses 'Profound Sorrow' Over Slavery, Stops Just Short of the One Thing Everyone Asked For
Nov 4
OpenAI Says ChatGPT Now Does 20% of Google's Search Volume, Which Is Like Saying Your Lemonade Stand Moved 20% of Coca-Cola's Units
Nov 4
New Irish Crime Series 'Tall Tales and Murder' Promises Mile-a-Minute Chaos, Confusion Guaranteed
Nov 4
Startup 3D Prints a Half-Meter Beam in Space, Because Folding Furniture Was Getting Old
Nov 4
Powys Hospital Bed Cuts: Health Board Insists Shrinking Rural Care Is the 'Safe' Option
Nov 3
Ferrari's $615,000 EV That Everyone Mocked Is Already Sold Out, Because of Course It Is
Nov 3
DeSantis Admits Iran War Is a 'Big, Big Drag' on GOP, Suggests Maybe Stop Gaslighting Voters About Gas Prices
Nov 3
Rio Tinto Deploys Millions to Halt Cane Toad's Western Invasion, Because Apparently Toads Don't Pay Rent
Nov 3
Apple Reportedly Building a $1,000 Smart Display With a Robotic Arm Because Your FaceTime Calls Deserve a Stalker
Nov 3
Seven Bomb Threats Across Europe Turn Out to Be Hoaxes, Because Apparently That's a Thing Now