BBC Politics
Burnham's PMQs Debut Proves New Politics Still Means Old Punch-Ups
Andy Burnham's first PMQs showed that even a social media-savvy PM can't escape the ancient ritual of political mud-wrestling.
2026-09-02
BBC Politics
2026-08-29
The Guardian Europe
James Cleverly Exits Shadow Cabinet to Chase London Mayoralty, Because Apparently Being Home Secretary Wasn't Enough
James Cleverly resigns from shadow cabinet to run for London mayor, claiming the city is the 'philosophical heart' of the Tories. Sadiq Khan, meanwhile, may or may not be 'asleep at the wheel'.
2026-08-08
BBC Politics
Badenoch Pens Letter to Clacton, Promises a 'Serious' Candidate (Eventually)
Kemi Badenoch writes a letter to Clacton promising a 'serious' Tory candidate - but only after Nigel Farage's self-serving by-election circus winds down.
2026-07-28
BBC Politics
New Education Secretary Discovers Student Loan System Is a Thing, Promises to 'Look At It'
Lucy Powell says student loans are 'egregious' and at the top of her in-tray, which is basically the political equivalent of putting something on your to-do list and hoping it resolves itself.
BBC Politics
Kemi Badenoch Demands Emergency Legislation to Stop Prisoners Getting Out Early, Which Her Government Started
Kemi Badenoch demands emergency legislation to stop early prisoner releases - a scheme her own party started, then left Labour to clean up.
2026-07-23
BBC Politics
Andy Burnham's First Day as PM: Working From Northern Branch of No 10, Because Why Commute?
Andy Burnham's first day as PM involves working from a new northern branch of No 10 in Manchester, because why not decentralize power with a side of irony?
2026-07-19
BBC Politics
Andy Burnham's Wardrobe Faces Its Toughest Test Yet: The House of Commons Tie Rule
Andy Burnham's transition from Manchester mayor to PM forces a wardrobe reckoning: will the king of casuals surrender to the tie, or keep his Adidas trainers in No 10?
2026-07-16
BBC Politics
Starmer Says It's the 'End of My Political Journey' at Final PMQs, Gets Sentimental Send-Off and a Fancy Clock
Sir Keir Starmer bows out of PMQs with tears, standing ovations, a vintage clock, and a surprising amount of goodwill - plus jokes about Count Binface and England's World Cup hopes.
2026-07-10
BBC Politics
Labour Under Burnham Promises to Be 'Faster and Bolder,' Which Sounds Great Until You Realize That's What They Said Last Time
Andy Burnham's Labour promises speed and emotional openness; opposition parties want actual policies, not just a relocated postcode.
2026-07-04
The Guardian
Labour Deputy Claims No 10 ‘Boys Club’ Silenced Critics, Hopes Burnham Will Bring Grown-Up Briefing Culture
Lucy Powell says No 10 was a boys club that silenced women via nasty briefings, and hopes Andy Burnham will bring a meritocracy where feet stay on the floor.
2026-06-28
BBC Politics
Cleverly Says He Wouldn't Have Used the Gestapo Jibe, Which Is Basically a 'No'
Shadow housing secretary says he'd have used different words than 'Gestapo' to criticise the education secretary, which is a bit like saying you'd have chosen a different shade of red for that bull.
2026-06-27
BBC Politics
Tories Promise Tax Break for Reservists, Because Nothing Says 'Defending the Realm' Like a Discount
Tories propose tax-free reserve service to boost numbers to 50,000, funded by cutting child benefit. Because who needs family support when you have national defence?
2026-06-25
BBC Politics
Education Secretary to Turn 'Spiteful Class Warrior' Insult Into T-Shirt, Because Nothing Says 'I'm Above the Fray' Like Merch
Bridget Phillipson plans to monetize Kemi Badenoch's 'spiteful class warrior' jab into apparel, while both sides trade insults over teacher numbers, racism allegations, and the proper etiquette for political discourse.
2026-06-19
BBC Politics
Scottish Tories Win First Westminster By-Election Since Nixon Was President, Promptly Remind Everyone They Can't Actually Keep the Seat
Scottish Tories win first Westminster by-election in 51 years, only for the winner to immediately have to resign from Holyrood due to dual-mandate rules. SNP loses seat but insists it's just a temporary breakup.
2026-06-09
The Guardian
Badenoch Declares Macpherson Report a Wrong Turn, Wants More Stop and Search - 'Doesn't Matter How Many Black Boys'
Kemi Badenoch blames Macpherson report for letting killers roam free, says stop-and-search doesn't care about your skin color - just your survival.
2026-05-28
The Guardian
British Museum Postpones Jewish Culture Lecture, Citing 'Significant Proportion' of Attendees Who Came to Heckle, Not Learn
British Museum postpones a Jewish culture lecture after discovering too many registered attendees were apparently there to protest, not ponder ancient pottery.
2026-05-22
BBC Politics
Government to Review Sentences for Teen Boys Who Raped and Filmed Attacks; Judge Wanted to Avoid 'Criminalising' Them
Three teenage boys who raped two girls, filmed the attacks, and shared the footage online avoided prison - prompting a government review and a chorus of 'you might want to rethink that.'
2026-05-15
The Guardian Europe
Starmer, Burnham, Farage, Polanski: This Week in Politics Felt Like a Guided Tour of Hell's Souvenir Shop
A weary public faces a soul-battle between Starmer, Farage, Polanski, and Badenoch - Dante would charge extra for this tour.
2026-05-03
BBC Politics
Kemi Badenoch Apologises After Bloody Sunday Footage Sneaks Into Video Like an Uninvited Guest
Kemi Badenoch blames 'very young people' for accidentally using Bloody Sunday footage in a video about veterans, prompting apologies and calls for personal contrition.
BBC Politics
Tories Vow to Tighten Benefit Cap, Because Apparently Some People Are Getting 'Unlimited' Free Money
The Tories want to tighten the household benefit cap so fewer people can escape it, because nothing says 'fairness' like making sure the poor stay poor.
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