A parent writes in to say their son is moving out, and while they're happy for him, they're also "bereft" - a state the writer describes as feeling like grief, complete with uncontrollable tears and an inability to look at old photos. They admit they weren't happy before having their son and fear returning to that state. Their partner is supportive, but there's only so much sobbing one person can endure, apparently.
Eleanor, the advice columnist, delivers the unsurprising but necessary news: it's okay to not feel okay about something good and right. She notes that parenthood means feeling more vulnerable and divided than the young person striking out on their own - which, she points out, would make for a very weird parent if they shared identical feelings.
Her advice includes accepting mixed feelings rather than trying to eliminate grief, seeking therapy for the fear of returning to a pre-child unhappiness, and - the most practical tip - getting busy with activities you can't do when your child is around, like travel or romantic time with your partner. The point, she says, is to remind yourself there are parts of you outside of them, and that fun still exists beyond their absence.
Because nothing says "moving on" like a well-timed vacation and a reminder that your entire identity isn't wrapped up in someone else's laundry.