Of all the outrageous things Donald Trump has done - from bombing countries to cozying up to dictators - his sneaky interference in last week's USA vs Belgium World Cup match somehow sparked the most united and furious global reaction. Condemnation was universal, because Trump's cheating heart just cannot grasp that the beautiful game wields more power over ordinary lives everywhere than he ever will. The world truly loves football. It does not love him. And then the USA lost anyway. Karma, you magnificent bastard.

In an age dominated by overbearing, illiberal economic and military powers, the men's World Cup is joyfully upending the conventional geopolitical pecking order. Smaller nations and ordinary people get a bigger shout. Despite China's massive state investment in the game, it failed to qualify. Russia, never much good at football, was kicked out after invading Ukraine. And despite all Trump's MAGA hooliganism, the US remains soccer small fry. So much for superpowers.

This modern morality play illuminates the limits of authoritarianism - and proves that on the pitch, at least, multiculturalism triumphs and underdogs score.