The Hill
U.S. Measles Cases Top 4,000, Because Apparently We Needed a Sequel to 2025
America's measles tally hits 4,080, Pennsylvania leads the pack with 1,105 cases, and a governor and health secretary are arguing over how to count the dead.
2026-10-10
The Hill
2026-10-06
The Hill
Court to Decide If 'Make Vaccines Optional Again' Was a Policy or a Temper Tantrum
RFK Jr.'s vaccine schedule overhaul goes to appeals court, because apparently 'arbitrary and capricious' is now a policy platform.
2026-09-11
The Guardian
Legionnaires' Disease Returns to New York, Because One Deadly Outbreak a Season Is Apparently Not Enough
One dead and four sickened in a new South Bronx legionnaires' cluster, because New York apparently needed a sequel to the Upper East Side outbreak.
2026-09-02
The Atlantic
America's Produce Aisle Now a Surprise Party for Parasites, Bacteria, and Printing Ink
From parasite-laced lettuce to ink-stained tofu, America's food safety system may be crumbling - but at least the outbreaks aren't worse (yet).
2026-09-01
Ars Technica
Trump Admin Shelves Cyclospora Research Just as Record-Breaking Outbreak Hits 30,000 Cases
While a record-breaking Cyclospora outbreak sickens nearly 30,000, the USDA decides to shutter its research - because why study a problem when you can just let it fester?
2026-08-25
The Atlantic
CDC Confirms Kindergarten Vaccination Rates Are Now Officially a Historical Low, Thanks Everyone
Kindergarten vaccination exemptions hit a record high, and it's not because kids suddenly developed a fear of needles.
2026-08-23
The Guardian
Eight-Year-Old Dies After Brain-Eating Amoeba Joins Birthday Party
A brain-eating amoeba crashes an eight-year-old's birthday party in Louisiana, because the climate crisis is now serving up deadly microbes in new locations.
The Guardian
Warrant Issued for Mental Health Advocate Wanted Over Husband's Sharp-Object Demise
A mental health advocate is wanted for allegedly killing her police officer husband with a sharp object, while the city keeps the pond closed and everyone pretends the irony isn't deafening.
2026-08-22
The Verge
Why Does It Seem Like Food Recalls Are Out of Control? (Spoiler: They Might Be, Sort Of)
Food recalls are up, but fear not - it's not just your imagination, and the government's budget cuts are definitely not helping the situation.
2026-08-15
The Atlantic
Fauci's Text Messages: A Crime Against Humanity, or Just a Guy Texting His Colleagues?
Senator Ron Johnson releases Fauci's group chat, sparking claims of a 'crime against humanity' - but the texts just show a public-health official being appropriately cautious, which is apparently now a felony.
2026-08-13
The Atlantic
Trump's New Vaccine Order: Because Confusing Parents Once Just Wasn't Enough
The Trump administration's latest executive order on vaccines is a masterclass in confusing public health guidance, splitting MMR shots and targeting 'high-risk' groups only - because who needs evidence when you have executive orders?
2026-08-11
BBC Business
Taylor Farms Recalls Jalapeno Products After Salmonella Outbreak, Because Apparently One Parasite Wasn't Enough
Taylor Farms recalls jalapeno products amid salmonella scare, adding to its recent cyclospora outbreak - because one foodborne illness just wasn't enough for 2023.
2026-08-10
The Guardian
Louisiana's Beach Season Now With Extra Flesh-Eating Bacteria, Officials Remind You Not to Panic
Louisiana's Gulf waters are serving up a side of flesh-eating bacteria this summer, with cases and deaths up - thanks, climate change.
2026-08-04
Ars Technica
Explosive Diarrhea Outbreak Kills Two; Feds Somehow 'Aware' But Not Counting
Two people have died from explosive diarrhea caused by Cyclospora, and the CDC is 'aware' but hasn't updated its numbers. Meanwhile, RFK Jr. is cooking salads on YouTube.
2026-08-03
The Atlantic
Ticks Are Winning, Humans Are Losing: America's Bloodsucking Overlords Expand Their Empire
Ticks are winning, humans are losing, and the solution might involve killing deer, vaccinating them, or turning their blood into poison - welcome to the war against the many-legged menace.
2026-07-31
The Guardian
Cyclosporiasis Outbreak May Be Slowing, Test-Maker Hopes, Because Lettuce Is Now Socially Awkward
A test-maker says the cyclosporiasis outbreak may be slowing, but with so many caveats, we're not holding our lettuce.
2026-07-26
The Atlantic
Public Health Finally Realizes MAHA Might Have a Point, Even If It’s Also a Bit Unhinged
Public health experts might finally admit that the MAHA movement, for all its anti-vax weirdness, is tapping into real frustrations - and maybe it's time to show up and fight like we mean it.
2026-07-23
The Atlantic
FDA's Cyclosporiasis Response: A Case Study in How Not to Communicate a Parasite Outbreak
The FDA's cyclosporiasis response has been a confusing mess of slow alerts, false positives, and vague warnings, leaving even Taco Bell-loving food safety reporters unsure what's safe to eat.
2026-07-18
The Atlantic
Cyclosporiasis Outbreak Solved: It Was the Lettuce, Again, Because of Course It Was
Federal health agencies confirm shredded lettuce from Taco Bell caused the cyclosporiasis outbreak, but the handling was so confusing that Americans still don't know if their salad is safe.
2026-07-16
The Atlantic
Ebola Outbreak Reminds Us We're Great at Forgetting What We Learned
The third-largest Ebola outbreak ever shows we've learned some things, but the U.S. seems determined to unlearn the importance of actually maintaining the systems that stop pandemics.
The Good Times
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