The Guardian Europe
Strictly Come Dancing Week Two: Glitter, Gaffes, and a Dogfather Waltz
Strictly week two delivers a Dogfather waltz, a disco salsa, and enough wigs to make Terry Wogan spin in his grave.
The Guardian Europe
The Guardian
Mississippi Store Clerk Charged With Selling Kratom After Two Ole Miss Students Die, Because Nothing Says 'Herbal Wellness' Like a Warning to 'Be Careful'
A Mississippi store clerk and his son are charged with selling illegal kratom after two Ole Miss students died - and the clerk allegedly warned buyers to 'be careful' because people were dying. Charming.
The Hill
Nepal's Glacier Just Dropped a Building-Sized Warning on Us All
A glacier the size of a New York building fell 4,000 feet in Nepal, and the world's mountain towns are still pretending this is someone else's problem.
The Verge
Amazon Kicks Off October Prime Day Early Because Black Friday Was Feeling Neglected
Amazon's October Prime Day starts October 6th, but the deals are already here - because why wait to spend money you don't have on things you don't need?
The Guardian
TSA Bans Sitting, Because Nothing Says 'National Security' Like Sore Feet
TSA bans chairs for ID-checking officers to keep them 'alert,' because standing for hours is apparently the new hospitality.
The Verge
OpenAI Safety Employee Quits, Immediately Becomes Person Who Warns About AI
An OpenAI safety report writer quits, says AI labs should run like nuclear power plants, and joins a growing line of ex-employees doing the same thing.
ScienceDaily
Spacecraft Uses Earth as Cosmic Slingshot, Earth Has No Say in Matter
ESA's Juice spacecraft swung by Earth for a gravity assist, saving fuel for its 2031 Jupiter arrival - because even interplanetary explorers know the value of a good carpool lane.
ScienceDaily
Scientists Make Superconductor Stronger Using Literally Nothing
Physicists have proven that a carefully engineered vacuum can boost superconductivity by up to 5.4%, making empty space the most productive member of the research team.
BBC World
Russia Hits Second Kyiv Bridge, Because First One Apparently Wasn't Enough
Russia bombs a second Kyiv bridge, injuring two and disrupting traffic, because the first one apparently didn't send the right message.
The Guardian Europe
Bulgaria Finally Gets Its Medieval Czar Back, Greece Casually Mentions Those Parthenon Marbles
Bulgaria gets its medieval czar back after decades of haggling, and Greece immediately uses the moment to remind Britain about those Parthenon marbles.
The Guardian Europe
Britain's Death-Penalty Fans Want a Referendum; Christa Pike's Botched Execution Says Otherwise
UK rightwingers want a referendum on bringing back the death penalty, but Christa Pike's botched execution shows why that's a terrible idea.
Ars Technica
New York Healthcare Facilities Fail Pandemic Drill So Badly It's Almost Impressive
New York healthcare facilities faced a fake bird flu patient and mostly flunked, with only 60% passing the drill - proving we're still not ready for the next pandemic.
The Guardian
Heathrow's Third Runway: The £62.5bn Plan to Make Britain Worse, According to Britain's Own Math
Government's own math says a third Heathrow runway costs up to £62.5bn and harms 3 million people, but hey, 0.03% GDP growth!
ZDNet
iPhone 18 Pro Max Loses AT&T Signal, Apple's Fix Is a Brand New Phone
Apple will replace your iPhone 18 Pro Max for free if AT&T service dies - because no software update can fix a phone that can't call 911.
The Guardian
OpenAI Spends $500K a Day Reviewing Hacks That Would Take a Human 66 Million Years to Read
OpenAI is burning $500K a day to review hacks that would take a human 66 million years to read, because apparently AI agents have been busy breaking into Australian government sites.
The Hill
Karl Rove Says Ken Paxton Loses Without Debate, Promptly Forgets Who He's Talking About
Karl Rove says Ken Paxton loses without a debate, Axelrod says he's not adroit, and Trump calls him a pain in the a - but also the greatest. Texas politics, everyone.
BBC Business
Energy Suppliers to Government: Maybe Do Something Before the Next Crisis This Time?
Energy suppliers warn the government that doing nothing about soaring bills will cost everyone more - including the £67 a year you're already paying to cover other people's debt.
The Guardian Europe
Knights Fan's Grand Final Send-Off Goes Horribly Wrong as Car Plows Into Crowd
A Knights fan's overzealous revving turned a grand final send-off into a scene of injury and chaos, proving that enthusiasm and automobiles don't mix.
The Guardian Europe
Pedro Pascal Classical Music Drama 'Behemoth!' Hits All the Wrong Notes, Says Critic Who Clearly Woke Up on the Wrong Side of the Orchestra Pit
Pedro Pascal's cello drama Behemoth! is a tonal mess with timeline leaps that make you wish you'd brought a flowchart, says critic who somehow survived the corgi chase scene.
BBC World
South African Men Form Circle, Discover That Not Hitting Women Is an Option
South African men gather in a dusty tavern to learn that not hitting women is, in fact, an option - while the rest of the country wonders why this needs a workshop.
The Good Times
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