In a move that surprised absolutely no one and delighted a few, US President Donald Trump declared during a two-day visit to Ireland that a united Ireland would be a "fantastic thing." Because nothing says deep geopolitical insight like a real estate mogul turned president weighing in on a century-old conflict.

Trump made the comments during a meeting with Taoiseach Micheál Martin at Farmleigh House in Phoenix Park. "I think it would be a fantastic thing; now the UK would have something to say about it obviously but I think it would be a great thing, I mean, how can it be bad?" Trump said, presumably while mentally measuring the property value of the entire island.

Earlier in the day, Trump had a courtesy call with Irish President Catherine Connolly at Áras an Uachtaráin, the official residence of the Irish president. Connolly, an outspoken Gaza activist who has been critical of the US and said Trump is acting "like a bully" over tariffs, reportedly came under pressure from Sinn Féin and other parties to raise Gaza during the brief meeting. Because nothing says "courtesy call" like a lecture on Middle East policy.

Trump also declared that the US-Ireland relationship is "stronger than ever," adding, "We've a big relationship with Ireland. The two countries do very well together. It's never been as good as it is right now." He said they discussed various topics, including trade - presumably the kind where you don't mention tariffs.

Upon arrival at Dublin Airport on Saturday morning, Trump was greeted by Tánaiste Simon Harris and Irish Foreign Minister Helen McEntee. He later attended events at the US Ambassador to Ireland's residence before heading to the Amgen Irish Open golf tournament, because priorities.

Ireland, one of the most pro-Palestinian countries in the EU, has been criticised by Israel for its stance. Irish authorities have been planning for Trump's visit for months in what is one of the biggest security operations in the history of the state. Thousands of protesters are expected in Dublin, with a small number of crowd control barriers already beside the American Embassy. Several protesters have also gathered in Doonbeg, a few miles from Trump's hotel, where he will attend the Irish Open.

Sixty-year-old Jessie Phillips, originally from Tennessee but living in county Clare, was among the protesters. "I just want him to see my placard so he knows I don't care for him and that my family doesn't care for him and that he's not welcome here or over there in my opinion," she said. Charming.

Trump will be accompanied by his sons Eric and Donald Trump Junior. There is a heavy Garda presence, road closures, and countless tricolour bunting through Doonbeg. Because nothing says "diplomatic visit" like a village decked out in flags and a security cordon.

Speaking earlier this week on the BBC's Borderlands podcast, Micheál Martin said: "We will have discussions with the president and there will be a reception in the American Embassy but I think he's also very anxious to get to Doonbeg and watch the Irish Open." An avid golf fan, Trump said in July he hoped to travel to Doonbeg to watch the Irish Open. In a special video message for the US Embassy's Fourth of July celebration, he said he wants to see "Rory [McIlroy] and all the great players." Because nothing says international diplomacy like ogling golfers.

"There's nothing better than Irish-American friendship and I have a beautiful place over there - it's one of the best, most beautiful golf courses anywhere in the world," Trump said in the message. "We have a place that's so top and we have the Irish Open going to be there. They call it Trump National, we sometimes use the name of the location, but it's Trump National Golf Club, and we're looking forward to it. We're going to have a tremendous celebration. I think I'm going to come over and I'm going to see it and watch. It'll be something very, very special." Yes, Donald, we're all very excited for you.

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On Friday night Trump boarded Air Force One at Joint Base Andrews in Maryland, near Washington DC, and flew out for his trip to Ireland. He visited the Republic in 2019, when he spent time at his golf course, but he also visited in 2023. Because why not make it a trilogy?