Donald Trump has reportedly told Vladimir Putin that he's prepared to help end Russia's ongoing war in Ukraine, because nothing says peace broker like a guy who just turned 80 and is planning a birthday cage match on the White House lawn.

During a phone call on Sunday that lasted about an hour - or roughly the same time it takes Putin to write a birthday greeting in his head - Trump informed the Russian president that ending the conflict was critical and that the US is nearing a peace deal with Iran, according to Yuri Ushakov, a Putin adviser. The call was described as “friendly and frank,” which in diplomatic speak means nobody hung up on anybody.

Fighting between Russia and Ukraine has now dragged on for more than four years since Russia launched its invasion in February 2022, making it longer than the first world war (1,566 days, if you're keeping score at home). Peace negotiations have been mostly on pause, but Trump officials recently stated at the G7 summit that they want the war to end “as quickly as possible,” which is the diplomatic equivalent of a shrug.

During the 55-minute call, Putin also wished Trump a happy 80th birthday in an “informal” manner, Ushakov said. The Kremlin website later posted Putin's greeting, which called Trump a “bright, remarkable person and politician” and expressed certainty that together they could “give Russian-American relations a new quality.”

Trump, for his part, is celebrating his birthday on Sunday with a $60m “UFC Freedom 250” cage match on the White House South Lawn, featuring a 92ft steel structure that some have likened to a colosseum and seven fighting bouts. Because nothing says diplomacy like watching two guys beat each other up while you blow out candles.