Trump Media & Technology Group, the proud owner of Truth Social, has announced a paid service launching 1 August that will give Wall Street firms high-speed access to its most influential posts. Because nothing says "free speech" like charging people to read the president's tweets milliseconds faster than the plebs.

President Donald Trump, currently the platform's most-followed user, often causes sudden swings in global markets with his musings on trade and tariffs. Until now, banks and traders had to monitor the app manually - a hardship that will soon be alleviated by the Truth API, a commercial data feed promising delivery in "milliseconds," 24/7.

The company, which launched in 2022 and is still loss-making, hopes this will create a steady new source of money. Kevin McGurn, interim boss, noted that "markets already move on Truth Social posts," implying the service will turn volatility into profit. Some firms have been scraping Truth Social's data without permission; McGurn warns these methods will be blocked, forcing firms to buy the official feed.

Since the Trump family remains majority shareholder, the president stands to profit directly from selling expedited access to his own public statements. Because when you're president, why not monetize the world's anxiety about your every word? The BBC reached out for comment on whether Trump's posts will be included but received no immediate response - perhaps they were busy setting up the payment gateway.