It is a truth universally acknowledged that any superhero who needs an external power source is starting on the back foot. Captain America is nothing without his shield. Elon Musk could theoretically slap together a metal suit and a proto-heart to become Iron Man, which tells you everything you need to know about the inherent problem. And now we arrive at the latest iteration of the Green Lantern legend, where the hero's power comes from a big green ring that requires periodic recharging from a big green power pack - because apparently, even cosmic law enforcement hasn't cracked wireless charging.

Lanterns, the new DC Comics television venture, retains all these elements and adds a mentor-mentee buddy-cop structure that spans two timelines: 2016 and 2026. The ever-dependable Kyle Chandler plays Hal Jordan, Earth's current Green Lantern, while the mesmerizing Aaron Pierre portrays his trainee John Stewart - one of DC's first African American superheroes, debuting in 1971. In 2016, Hal is weary and lazy about teaching John to be his backup, with zero intention of retiring or dying (which is an enormous amount of trust to place in a piece of jewelry with a battery worse than your phone's). The 2016 John, a well-disciplined son of a marine, former sniper, architect, and vegan, is a model of quiet endurance, respecting the chain of command and retaining his poise.

The show does feature evil extraterrestrials attempting to detonate entire towns, which sounds exciting, but not even the almighty Green Lantern and his protege can save this from feeling a whole lot of meh. The Guardians, an immortal race on the planet Oa who run the Green Lantern Corps, add a layer of cosmic bureaucracy that somehow makes intergalactic policing feel like a DMV visit. The two-timeline structure tries to add depth, but the 2016 scenes feel like a prologue to a prologue, and by the time you're cutting through all that, there's a lot of meh to wade through.

In short, Lanterns is a superhero caper that's less 'brightest day, blackest night' and more 'dim afternoon, beige evening.' It's a testament to the actors' talents that they manage to keep the whole thing watchable, but even they can't recharge this ring. If you're looking for a cosmic adventure, you might be better off checking your phone's battery - at least that thing has a chance of hitting 100%.