Another week, another nonexistent phone to obsess over. We've been faithfully tracking the Trump phone's whereabouts for months, but now a new contender has entered the ring - and it's out-Trumping the Trumps.
Robot vacuum manufacturer Dreame has announced two phones that are almost certainly never going to see the light of day, and one of them takes the Trump phone's vaporware playbook and cranks it to 11. The devices were "launched" last Thursday at a flashy San Francisco event, though they'd actually been announced in China back in March with no release date, pricing, or specs. That's vaporware by any definition, though Dreame can at least claim it had physical phones on display - something Trump Mobile has yet to manage.
The phones are ambitiously absurd. One is a modular device with detachable action cam and AI accessories, but the real star is the Aurora Lux, which will supposedly come in 29 different designs, most coated in gems, gold, or both. Designs include the Axiom Shield (a Pixel 10 in snakeskin), Luxe Loop Sanctuary (a ring of gems around the camera island), Imperial Totem (featuring a glittering peacock), and Golden Age - a diamond-patterned gold phone with a gem-ringed camera island turned into an analog clock. Trump Mobile must be kicking itself it didn't think of that.
Dreame's launch event was also a masterclass in over-the-top glitz, featuring models, rocket cars, and Steve Wozniak. Compare that to Trump Mobile's launch nearly a year ago: three middle-aged executives crammed onto a tiny stage with Don Jr. and Eric Trump in a badly lit room in Trump Tower. Why can a robot vacuum company project more glamour than the Trumps?
At least Dreame's phones are exciting in their impossibility, unlike the boringly midrange T1 Phone. And to be fair, Dreame isn't taking $100 deposits for phones it may never launch, nor does it have that frisson of political proximity that makes Trump Mobile so compelling to gawk at. But if Dreame beats the odds and puts one of its gem-encrusted fantasy phones in my hands before Trump Mobile does, I'll consider it a win.